LXIII | Feeling ❦ I offer to wash the dishes.I’ve never done that. It must be becausetoday’s an illusion. So it doesn’t feel like a chore. But todayfeelsreally good. My parentsdon’t take out their phones or sitat opposite endsof the living roomin silence. They sit next to each other,talking in low voices. The parrot is … Read more
LXII | Remorse ❦ A tap on the shoulder.A shake.A gruff voice,‘Oi! Boy!’ I open my eyes. The taxi has stopped. The driveris not in his seat. He’s pulled my door,gesturing me to leave. I blink. The clouds are slightly blue. Morning? ‘The bird stopped liao.‘Faster, go!’ A shooing motion.(As if i’m the bird.) I … Read more
LXI | Parrot ❦ ‘And you just let her be?’I ask. Aspen picks uphis phone from the ground. He clicks the torchlight on,shines it at me. In what worldwould Aspen allow Rowan and I to be together till 1 amin the night? ‘Of course‘I don’t like it,’ he retorts,‘but she’s Rowan…’ A pause. I watch … Read more
LX | Captured ❦ When I reach my house, I hearthe usual shoutingfrom inside and make a decision. I’m not gonna do anything about it. Throw my socks in a corner.Shoes on the rack.School bag beside bedroom door. Slam the door shut. I lie flaton my bed. The room is engulfed in darkness. Darkness will … Read more
LIX | Sunset ❦ I don’t haveexamstoday but I go to schoolto study. I come throughthe back gate like I usually dowhen I’mskippingassembly. Force of habit. The rowan treelooks lifelesswithout her there, sitting beneath itwith a book in hand. I study, my phone beepingwith messages from Rowan. Where are you?Want to study together? An interesting … Read more
LVIII | Meaning ❦ After I kissed Rowanat the cafe, I feel like I understand her less. I notice herlooking over at me during classand her eyes pray for my prelim results to be okay. Has she alwayswatched melike thiswithout me knowing? Stop it, Clyde. Focus. The teacher is giving outanswer booklets now. I need … Read more
LVII | Study ❦ Rowan finishes her coffeebefore she starts studying. She’s already addicted. She orders a second cup. Her textbooksand notes fill the lengthof the four people table. ‘You’re not studying?’ she asks. A shrug. I lean backin my dark velvet seat. ‘Maybe later,’ I reply. Her eyesfind a line on the page … Read more
LVI | Coffee ❦ It’s my first timeseeing Rowan express awe. The door gives a tinkling laughas I hold it open for her. She steps intothe cafe, eyes wider than Famous Amos cookies. The floor is tiledblack and whitelike a chess board, the tables made of thick wood, paired with dark velvet chairs. But through … Read more
LV | Red Dress ❦ ‘We can’t!‘Mid-years start tomorrow. ‘I need to study.’ Rowan is sittingunder the rowan tree, textbook in hand. No Bible. ‘I went for your church picnic.‘You promised.’ Her expressionlessexpressionlooks panicky for a moment. The rowan treeby the school’s back gate is bald even though it’s April. I take her hand,pull her … Read more
LIV | Home ❦ She doesn’t talk to me in schoolthe next day. But when I text her after soccerwith my friends: WHAT DID YOU MEANYESTERDAY? She replies:SORRY FOR LOSING CONTROL. Ming looks overat meand grins. The girls are laughingaround us at something Jasper said. I didn’t hear. Kumar asks himto explain the math joke … Read more
